I was pretty low energy tonight on the way to the Maiden, but for some reason perked up immediately upon entering, despite the fact there were only six teams in attendance and 17 people. I think it was just that everyone was so nice tonight, and super quiet and mellow, and nothing gets my juices flowing like quiet mellowness. Show me a girl who loves to sit in a library and read and I will show you smitten… assuming of course that also our biological chemistry matches—i.e. we are attracted to one another. Otherwise forget it.

So I got amped up and I jumped around and told jokes, as I am wont to do, some of which are funny, some of which drop down a well of mildly confused silence, disappearing in the oily murk below. I love the Maiden but where I set up there is this huge unwieldy table that’s shaped like a giant, black pentagon… if the devil played baseball, he’d use this thing as his home plate. Something about the shape of it and its vicinity to the benches that line the walls makes it really hard to A.) get all my materials as well as the restaurant’s PA system placed on and around it, and B.) move from one side to the other when having to emcee something like, oh, say a Christmas Carol singing round. But somehow I managed and we had a fun, if very studious round of Christmas Carol or Question. It was mostly run of the mill, except for the lady Linda from Goldman and Sachs (the team, not the multibillion-dollar investment firm… though they probably could have used the money from the pot), who came up in all four rounds and sang Christmas carols every time better than Jesus himself.

I had the most fun tonight offering bonus “challenges” to tie in with fun Christmas facts. For instance, 7 out of ten dog owners in the U.S. supposedly get their dogs a Xmas present (and we wonder why we are struggling economically… sheesh people, stop getting your DOGS Christmas PRESENTS!), so I offered five points to any team who could show me a picture of someone’s dog. For the fun fact, “during the holiday season, more than 5,000 Americans use their VISA card per second,” I offered five points to any team with someone who had three or more Visa cards in their wallet. Nearly every team nailed it. This Christmas, I am thankful for out credit-based economy!

JWS